Thursday, November 15, 2007

Full-body traction anyone?

My grandparents had a rule that they would use on each other to keep the family running smoothly. It's a simple regulation, but if anyone broke it, they would call foul immediately.

The rule is this: You only get seven minutes of whining a day. Any more belly-aching than that, and you're just wallowing. So shut it.

Grandmother still enforces this one on the family, and it's safe to bet that she's pulled it out on a few crybaby strangers from time to time, too.

With that rule in mind, I will not go into great detail about how stiff my legs are or how I had to use my arms to lower myself onto the toilet today. No. I will instead pop my Advil quietly, chase it with a handful of olives (washed down with vodka) and quit bitching.

But tomorrow's a whole new day with seven more minutes.

3 comments:

cadiz12 said...

oh my goodness. if that were my grandma, i'd try and declare it a new day every ten minutes or so.

Brandi said...

Yeah, I don't abide with that rule. I believe you should express yourself no matter what. But, on the other hand, I think if you're complaining all the time and not taking steps to fix the problem, then I ain't got no sympathy for you.

Mary B. said...

I like that rule, but every now and again it's good to wallow for a few extra minutes. :)