27 and still kicking ass

Today, I reached my late 20's. Laying in my Ikea loft bed, which still feels startlingly like a bunk bed from elementary school, I thought about what my new age means. Here are the thoughts that ran through my head:

Finally, I am officially old enough to roll my eyes at people who do kegstands and the idiots who hold their feet.

I hope I never have to eat ramen noodles again.

If I'm going to become a rock goddess and OD on some needle drug, I've got a year to get it done before it becomes tacky and passé.

Why does it happen that every time I turn on the radio, every station just sounds like sheep wrestling at 3 a.m. It's probably the iPod's fault.

Isn't 27 too old to get a zit?!!

Didn't Time Magazine say that 27 was the age when it starts getting harder for women to get pregnant?

I wonder if I have any diet coke in the refrigerator.